ALICIA KEYS Reveals 5 Daily Rituals To Calm Your Nervous System

Here are the top 10 insights from Alicia Keys' conversation with Jay Shetty that will help you calm your nervous system and build a more authentic life.

1. Trust your inner voice despite external opinions

Alicia Keys shared how she struggled with trusting herself due to the constant barrage of external opinions. She discovered that many of the doubts and fears we carry aren't even our own but inherited from parents, peers, and society. This self-doubt affected various aspects of her life, from career decisions to personal relationships.

Keys developed a practice of asking herself "what do you think?" even when strong personalities or trusted friends offered their opinions. She found that journaling helped her access her inner truth when she had difficulty expressing it to others. This practice of turning inward ultimately led to greater decisiveness and clarity without requiring validation from others.

2. Time unfolds on its own schedule, not yours

One of Keys' most profound realizations was that nothing happens in the timeframe we expect. She learned to put one foot in front of the other and focus on taking small, determined steps rather than becoming overwhelmed by the entire journey. This insight helped her manage anxiety around her projects, including her Broadway musical "Hell's Kitchen" which took 13 years to create.

Keys used the metaphor of running a marathon to illustrate this concept, recalling how her trainer broke down the overwhelming distance into manageable segments. She applied this same incremental approach to her creative endeavors and life challenges. By accepting divine timing and releasing her need to control exactly when things happen, she found greater peace and effectiveness in her work.

3. Replace negative self-talk with affirming statements

Keys emphasized the importance of consciously replacing negative self-talk with affirmations. She creates personalized affirmations based on what she needs to hear. Her affirmations range from practical ones like "I'm going to be on time" to compassionate ones like "I forgive myself."

The practice of "speak to me nice" became a fundamental principle in her life. Keys noticed how we wouldn't let others speak to us disrespectfully, yet we often speak harshly to ourselves. She teaches this concept to her children, particularly her youngest son who can be tough on himself. This regular practice of self-affirmation has transformed how she relates to herself and handles challenges.

4. Physical manifestations of stress require holistic solutions

Keys discussed how her persistent skin issues were a physical manifestation of stress. She realized her body was reacting to stress from her demanding career and challenging relationships. This understanding eventually led to the creation of her holistic beauty line, Keys Soul Care.

Her approach to skin care evolved beyond surface treatments to address the soul beneath. She incorporated ancient rituals, crystals, and affirmations into her products, recognizing that external beauty is connected to internal peace. Keys discovered that true healing requires addressing both the physical symptoms and the underlying emotional causes, creating a philosophy of "soul care" that complements traditional self-care routines.

5. Make space for yourself to find your power

Despite initial resistance and excuses about lack of time, Keys discovered that spending time with herself was transformative. She found that carving out moments for meditation, even if it meant waking up at 5:30 AM before her children, helped settle her spirit and clear her mind. This dedicated personal time made her more efficient and decisive.

The practice of spending time alone helped Keys connect with her intuition and true desires. She realized that she couldn't properly care for others, including her children, if she wasn't taking care of herself first. This shift in perspective allowed her to become more powerful than she'd ever been, operating with greater clarity and purpose.

6. Daily rituals create stability and calm during stress

When facing particularly challenging days, Keys relies on a set of non-negotiable rituals. Meditation forms the foundation of her practice, helping to center her even on the most difficult days. She complements this with journaling to release pent-up thoughts and feelings.

Physical movement is another essential component, as she finds that a good workout helps her reconnect with her body's strength. She incorporates her skincare routine as part of this ritual, using products with affirmations like "I welcome all circumstances as a catalyst for change." These consistent practices provide stability and allow her to maintain balance regardless of external circumstances.

7. Gratitude is the simplest yet most potent tool for transformation

Keys considers gratitude to be the most powerful tool for changing energy. Even in moments of intense anger or frustration, she starts listing what she's grateful for and finds it immediately shifts her perspective. She teaches this practice to her children, encouraging them to both give thanks and pray for what they're looking for.

This gratitude practice helps break negative thought cycles and creates space for joy. Keys believes this simple habit is key to opening doors in life. She views gratitude not just as an occasional practice but as a foundational life skill that can transform how we experience challenges and setbacks.

8. Parents give gifts and leave gaps that shape our relationships

Keys reflected on how parents give both gifts and gaps that influence future relationships. From her mother, she received the gift of strength and a clear sense of boundaries, but also inherited patterns of needing to fix situations. From her father, she gained self-determination while also absorbing feelings of unworthiness that she later had to restructure.

These parental influences created templates that affected all her subsequent relationships. Keys recognized that we often expect others to fill the gaps our parents left while providing the same gifts they gave us. Understanding this pattern helped her develop healthier relationships and more realistic expectations of others, including her husband and children.

9. Complementary strengths create balance in relationships

Keys' 14-year marriage to Swizz Beatz thrives on their complementary differences. She describes him as teaching her to "be in the flow" and embrace the magic of the moment. Meanwhile, she brings structure, design, and strategic planning to their partnership.

Their relationship succeeds through mutual respect for each other's unique approach. They practice "loving with an open hand," allowing each other freedom to be authentic rather than trying to control or change one another. This balance of seemingly contradictory traits—structured planning versus spontaneous flow—creates a stimulating and harmonious partnership that supports their individual growth.

10. Creative visions require both personal conviction and collaborative openness

Keys discussed how she maintains her creative vision while allowing collaborative input, particularly regarding her Broadway musical "Hell's Kitchen." She emphasized the importance of having a clear personal vision that only you can see, while also recognizing when to incorporate others' contributions that enhance the work.

The creative process requires discernment between inputs that dilute your vision versus those that elevate it. Keys learned to identify collaborators whose contributions were "additive" rather than distracting. This approach allowed her Broadway project to evolve over 13 years while maintaining its core essence. She discovered that bringing in the right energies at the right time created something more magnificent than she could have achieved alone, while still honoring her original vision.