The Very Online Wandering Monk - Tasshin Fogleman
Here are the top 10 key takeaways from Tasshin Fogelman's conversation about living as a modern monk, finding authentic purpose, and creating a life aligned with your deepest values.
1. Burnout stems from misalignment with deepest values
Burnout happens when people repeatedly engage in activities that exhaust them not just physically, but morally, spiritually, and ethically. This occurs when individuals force themselves into life choices that conflict with their core values and authentic desires. The exhaustion isn't simply from working hard—it's from working against your own nature.
The antidote to burnout involves living in accordance with your deepest values and goals. When work aligns with your authentic self, it becomes energizing rather than depleting. This shift transforms the experience from forced obligation to natural expression.
2. Traditional scripts often fail to resonate with unique individuals
Many people find themselves dissatisfied with conventional life scripts like the standard education-career-retirement path. Tasshin experienced this early, realizing in fifth grade that the typical educational trajectory felt limiting and tragic. The idea of learning ending after college seemed fundamentally wrong to someone who wanted continuous growth.
The rejection of traditional paths often begins with a visceral sense that these predetermined routes don't fit. Rather than conforming to societal expectations, some individuals must forge entirely new approaches. This requires courage to step away from familiar structures without clear alternatives.
3. Life is fundamentally about learning lessons and giving gifts
A powerful framework for understanding life's purpose involves two core activities: learning lessons and giving gifts. Everyone has unique lessons to learn and distinct gifts to offer the world. This perspective removes the pressure of finding one specific "life purpose" and instead creates an ongoing practice of growth and service.
This framework provides flexibility while maintaining direction. Rather than seeking a single predetermined mission, individuals can focus on continuous learning and generous contribution. The gifts you offer are uniquely yours—no one else can give exactly what you can give to the world.
4. Generosity as a practice transforms both giver and receiver
Generosity operates as a spiritual practice that benefits the giver as much as the receiver. When you make a gift, you affirm that your actions have consequences and that what you do matters in the world. This practice cultivates "right view" by demonstrating the interconnected nature of existence and the power of individual choice.
The act of giving freely, without expectation of specific returns, creates a different relationship with abundance and scarcity. Many successful practitioners structure their work on a generosity basis—offering value freely while allowing others to support them voluntarily. This approach often proves more sustainable and fulfilling than transactional exchanges.
5. Simple living enables authentic life choices
Reducing material needs to essentials—food, shelter, clothing, medicine, and internet access—creates tremendous freedom in life choices. When your expenses are minimal, you're not trapped by financial obligations that force you into unfulfilling work. This simplicity isn't about deprivation but about clarity regarding what you actually need versus what society tells you to want.
Living simply provides a crucial psychological safety net. Once you know you can thrive on very little, you always have the option to return to that level if other pursuits don't work out. This knowledge removes fear-based decision making and enables more authentic choices based on values rather than survival concerns.
6. The internet enables connection with like-minded "weirdos"
Online platforms create unprecedented opportunities to find others who share your unique interests and ways of being. For people who felt like outsiders in their immediate communities, the internet provides access to kindred spirits worldwide. This connection validates unconventional paths and provides crucial support for alternative lifestyles.
The digital realm allows for the formation of communities based on values and interests rather than geographical proximity. These connections often prove more meaningful than traditional local relationships because they're built on authentic resonance rather than circumstantial convenience.
7. Trusting your own wisdom becomes essential for spiritual maturity
There comes a point in spiritual development where external authorities—teachers, traditions, institutions—must give way to inner guidance. This transition requires moving from following prescribed paths to trusting your own deepest wisdom and intuition. While external guidance serves important purposes initially, ultimate spiritual authority must reside within.
This shift involves learning to distinguish between ego-driven desires and authentic inner calling. The practice involves consistently choosing what feels genuinely right while remaining open to correction and growth. It's about becoming your own spiritual authority while staying humble and receptive to wisdom from all sources.
8. Work and play can become indistinguishable when aligned with purpose
When you discover work that aligns with your deepest values and natural gifts, the traditional distinction between work and play dissolves. This type of work feels energizing rather than draining and becomes something you want to do every day. The idea of retirement becomes irrelevant because the activity itself provides fulfillment.
This integration creates a sustainable approach to productivity and contribution. Rather than working to fund a separate "real life," the work itself becomes an expression of your authentic self. This shift requires patience and experimentation to discover what truly energizes you versus what you think should energize you.
9. Loving-kindness practice cultivates intentional positive states
Unlike meditation practices that involve passive observation, loving-kindness meditation actively cultivates specific mental and emotional states. You intentionally generate loving thoughts and feelings, starting with yourself and extending outward to others. This practice demonstrates that you can consciously create positive internal experiences rather than being victim to whatever arises.
The practice begins with directing love toward yourself, then progressively extends to loved ones, neutral people, difficult people, and eventually all beings. Regular practice literally rewires your default emotional responses and increases your capacity for genuine warmth and connection. This isn't mere positive thinking but a systematic training in unconditional love.
10. Ordinariness combined with authenticity creates profound impact
The most transformative spiritual teachers often embody a paradox of deep wisdom combined with complete ordinariness. They don't try to be special or perfect but simply show up as fully themselves. This authenticity allows their natural love and wisdom to shine through in ways that feel accessible and real to others.
Striving to be extraordinary often creates barriers between yourself and others. When you embrace your ordinariness while simultaneously living with full authenticity, you give others permission to do the same. This combination of groundedness and genuineness often has more impact than trying to project an image of spiritual perfection.